When you have time, I have some things for you to look at. It's not complete, but now that I've made some decent progress, I wanted you to be able to see what I've got in case you had some changes you wanted to make.
[ and he does: he's in casual clothes when he shows up, the type given by this place to the adopted. he also has his gear with him to facilitate the needed testing for grip and usability.
erwin inclines his head in greeting when he sees jayce, setting the whole shebang aside for now. ]
Good to see you again. I hope you're doing well.
[ he's still not a small talk guy, but at least the greeting part rarely goes amiss. ]
[ Small talk is still not really Jayce's thing either, but he smiles at the greeting. ]
Pretty good. You too, I hope.
[ Jayce sets aside what he'd been tinkering with and unwrapping the arm, and also the padded elastic covering for his arm that he'd sewn (with help from Viktor). ]
We can see how this fits first, [ he says, handing over the latter as he runs one more diagnostic on the arm proper. ]
[ the arm is beautiful, and the fact that erwin thinks so is open in his expression. he looks at it for a long moment before even taking the padded arm covering, but when he does he nods in agreement and shifts his stance slightly to allow him to work out how it goes on and apply it properly since he's got that short sleeve pinned right up to the shoulder seam already. levi's bound to want to help with anything he might need, but erwin also wants to know exactly how everything works so he can do it himself and also impart the information later.
this part at least is the most self-explanatory and easy to fiddle with. ]
It feels how I think it would, [ he offers, ] Snug but not too snug. It doesn't feel as though it's going to slip, either.
[ Pushing his glasses up, Jayce isn't immune to the swell of pride at someone admiring his work. It feels good after everything that's happened to be able to create something like this, something he could be proud of. He lets Erwin get that first part on, standing by in case he asked for assistance. Otherwise, Jayce's attention is on the arm itself, carefully testing the mechanisms to make sure there aren't any issues. ]
That's good. If it starts to feel too loose, we can stitch another one. It should last a few months of regular use before the band starts to wear down. [ Jayce had written out some care instructions for it, which he handed over. ] There's some things for that, and the arm, on this in case you run into some problems, but I'll always be around if something happens.
[ Now for the important part: said arm. Lifting it up, Jayce walked it over to Erwin. ] How did you want to do this? I can help you, or I can walk you through it.
[ it's moving, honestly: erwin had never even considered the potential of having a replacement for his lost arm in any capacity, instead leading with practicality and resource conservation by simply learning how to do everything with one arm. so that in itself is a lot, and to have so much effort clearly put into the result is...
well, let's just say it's a lot. he takes the care instructions with a nod, giving them a quick read before tucking them away. he'll give another read later, more lengthy, once this part is settled. ]
Of course. [ he considers the question, then settles on: ] I think my best bet for retention is to watch while you help with it once, then watch a removal, then replicate both myself in case I need to be corrected for in future.
[ Stepping around to the side, Jayce kept the focus on the actual arm as he helped. ] It's sturdy, so don't worry about using the table for support or anything when you go to put it on. It might scratch the table, [ and Jayce chuckled, ] but it'll take a lot to do any damage to the arm itself. I made this from the same alloy I used for a lot of my projects back home.
[ It cost a lot of hours in late night labor to get his hands on the base materials, but it was worth it. Fitting it into place, Jayce made sure it was snug. ]
Once it's in place, it should sort of... [ Jayce gestures, and watches as the mechanisms in the arm come to life. ] Like that. You'll always know it's in place because it should do that on its own.
Did you want to see how it feels before I show you how to take it off?
[ erwin watches each movement with his full attention, taking in every detail of how the arm goes on, how it feels when it's properly attached, how each little mechanism 'wakes up' as jayce sets it to rights.
he is, pointedly, extremely normal about this, by which i mean his attention gets even more intense for a moment, in part because to be frank, there really isn't anything like this where he's from and every time he sees anything like this he's going to be a strange mixture of overwhelmed and fascinated.
at the suggestion erwin nods; it makes sense. he takes a moment to get used to the feel of it, the weight, how the joints work, how to make said joints and bits work. he can tell it's going to have a learning curve, but being able to, say, flex fingers (have fingers to flex in the first place) is, well, a good start. ]
I'll get used to the heft of it pretty quickly too, I think. It'll just be about re-learning my original center of balance from before I lost the limb in the first place.
[ Jayce gives him all the time he needs to adjust to the arm, because he's never experienced this himself, exactly, but he's watched the way the braces he'd built Viktor affected him, the prosthetics for his mother, and it seemed overwhelming, getting just a little bit more of that normalcy back.
So he doesn't say anything, just observes, checks the mechanics of the arm as they come to life and move, and he waits. ]
Yeah, though I tried to make sure it weighs about the same as your other arm. It might be a little more but it's close.
it chills him when someone goes home without warning. will he be next? are they running out of time? he can't live with that mindset, though. he can't waste the time they do have preoccupied with when it might end. he'd never forgive himself if it did.
easier said than done, but he's doing his best not to think about it.
as fate would have it, it's around the same time that apartments are made available to adopted—somewhere they can live with whoever they want. really, it was the one thing he could have wished for: the only thing that would be better than having Erwin back is having Erwin back and being able to live with him.
the idea alone of falling asleep every night and waking up every morning next to him makes him deliriously happy.
their new home is small, cramped even, but he doesn't notice and wouldn't care even if he did. it has basic furnishings, though, which is still more than he expected as someone who has always had nothing.
in fact, he has to comment in surprise the first time he sees their new bed: ]
Wow. It's so big.
[ it literally isn't. it's like a full bed at most, maybe even a double. sad! ]
[ it's something erwin worries about too. to not have control over that kind of thing makes him all the more determined to figure out a way to get them 'home' — to someone else's home, where they can make a new home without worrying about the things they left behind or erwin's death.
it'd be ideal, wouldn't it? more than this, even.
for now though, the apartments come at a good time. it lets them not have to worry about being apart for longer than necessary, or appeasing roommates while spending time with each other, or, frankly, despite never saying it aloud, having points where they're not able to tell if the other is still around or not.
maybe it's clingy, maybe it's codependent. that doesn't matter, nor does what anyone else would cause it. what matters, really, truly, is making sure they stay together (and that erwin can make levi happy, but at least he's not second-guessing himself on that one too badly lately).
so yeah, the apartment is great. beyond great, really, and erwin's just as happy as levi is. a small shared space is fine. it's self-contained, furnished, and all theirs.
erwin, too, is pleased by the bed. it's very tragic that them sharing a full bed is a cause for that much happiness. better than the twin they'd been sharing, sure, but still.
either way: ]
I think this place suits us.
[ small, simple, but theirs. homey in a way barracks or the dorms couldn't ever be. things erwin never expected to get. ]
[ frankly, he's going to be as clingy and codependent as he fucking wants. if Erwin gets tired of it he'll back off, of course, but he spent far too long pining and then grieving not to take full advantage of every moment they have together.
and now, they finally have their own private space. it's going to be so much easier like this.
so no, their bed is not large by normal people standards, but they don't really have normal people standards. Levi in particular slept sitting up in a fucking chair until after Erwin died, so this looks positively heavenly.
he smiles to himself, leaning to rest his head against Erwin's shoulder. ]
[ the reality is erwin is never going to get sick of it. he's going to be exactly as bad (good?) about it as levi, and he doesn't even have the excuse of being a widower for years. he's just intense because that's who he is.
but levi knows that. levi knows erwin better than anyone else ever has and sometimes erwin's chest tightens when he thinks about it not in a bad way but because he's never felt so grounded and at peace and he knows levi can tell.
it's nice. overwhelming, but nice.
the maybe-a-joke-maybe-not-a-joke just makes erwin smile as he looks down at the top of levi's head, more content than he's ever been. ]
Somehow I think we'll manage to balance how we share the space. [ see: all up in each other's business constantly. ] We always make do.
[ erwin doesn't notice it, but on the wall behind them his shadow has tilted its head further to rest on top of the shadow of levi's, somehow even more codependent than its owner.
[ he doesn't notice it either... for now. only because it's behind him and he's too busy gazing blissfully at the bed he gets to share with his... uh, partner? he's not quite sure what to call Erwin these days. 'boyfriend' sounds stupid and juvenile, but 'partner' somehow doesn't seem like it's sufficient to describe their relationship. they aren't married, though, so 'partner' wins for now. ]
I don't even know what to do with so much space, to be honest. I never had—
[ how was he planning on finishing this sentence when he started talking? there's no good way. furniture? decorations? worldly possessions in general?
he never had anything. he just leaves it and moves on. ]
—Well, whatever. I'm sure you'll just naturally come up with the most strategically sound way to arrange everything, anyway.
[ he slips his hand into Erwin's, like he's preemptively proud of him for how perfectly he will undoubtedly arrange the contents of their apartment. ridiculous. ]
[ yeah, neither of them are gonna notice it for a minute here probably because they're too busy having a moment over getting nice things while being together and all the other overwhelming things you feel when you've lived in a shithole your entire life and now you don't. levi more so than erwin even, which is saying something, but levi doesn't need to finish the sentence anyway.
erwin knocks their hips together after that last bit, then shifts to sit on the edge of the bed like he owns the place. which they technically do. crazy.
he holds out his hand, the organic one, and smiles. ]
The most comfortable arrangement, you mean.
[ because they get to be comfortable. crazy, but he's all for it. like, sure, it'll still be strategically sound, but it'll be a homey strategically sound. ]
[ as adept as he is at talking shit, it's very difficult for him to do it to Erwin—believably, at least. there's just a little too much fondness in his voice covering the edge; a little too much pulling at the edges of his mouth threatening a smile.
why pretend he's not actually obscenely happy, though? why hold himself back from truly celebrating the fact that he gets to live with the man he loves indefinitely? it's a waste of their time, and he's not going to be doing any of that.
so when Erwin offers him his hand he takes it, lifts a knee onto the bed, and then uses all of his weight to ease Erwin down onto his back so he can just lie there on top of him.
[ deadpan. now that they have time to just be People™ he's able to work a little more humor into regular conversations. it's nice. one of the plusses. but also it's kinda true. compared to levi he had a very cushy childhood (up to a certain point), but even that was, well, what it was.
he moves easily with levi's urging, dropping onto his back to look up at the other man with what can only be described as an overwhelming amount of fondness. he settles his hand at the small of levi's back afterward, head tilting.
happiness looks good on him. makes him look a little younger, even. ]
[ he's perfectly aware Erwin's being facetious, but he's going to play along anyway. in fact, he makes something of a show of making himself as comfortable as possible on top of him, though it's not as effective as it would be if he weren't so much smaller than Erwin. a large dog would probably cause more discomfort.
in any case, once he's satisfied, he settles down and tucks his head under Erwin's chin. ]
Immensely. I'm surprised you can't tell, you're normally very astute.
[ he says this as levi shifts on top of him, as the smaller man gets as comfortable as possible atop erwin's frame. as the younger man tucks in under his chin he huffs out a small sound, affectionate and amused both, and slides his hand up to settle between levi's shoulder blades before he says anything else.
in fact, the other hand lifts to brush fingers through the ends of levi's hair. then he speaks. ]
I'm suddenly feeling much, much better. I'm not sure why that could possibly be.
Hmm. Weird, I tend to have the opposite effect on people.
[ it's true, to be fair.
part of him just wants to stay where he is for hours. it's not very practical, unfortunately, but that's okay because starting now he gets to sleep with (sorry, next to) Erwin every single night.
maybe not directly on top of him, though. it can't possibly be that comfortable, no matter what Erwin says. with that in mind (and Erwin's comfort is always on his mind), he finally rolls off of him and attaches himself to Erwin's side instead. ]
I don't think I ever even imagined having a place like this.
[ the punchline here is supposed to be that erwin is very, very easygoing and normal and fine, but everyone following along at home knows he's the most intense man on any planet. with that said, he's getting a pass for his awful joke because when it comes to levi and only levi, his intensity has a different flavor that could be construed, if you squint really hard, as being easygoing.
when levi shifts so does erwin, though only to roll onto his side and drape his arm over levi to let it dangle, touching just to touch, his fingertips just barely brushing the sheets behind levi. ]
We didn't know this kind of existence was possible, so I don't think it's surprising to not have had that kind of daydream.
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text — un: defender;
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stares into the distance i wrote this tag days ago what happened to it
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[ and he does: he's in casual clothes when he shows up, the type given by this place to the adopted. he also has his gear with him to facilitate the needed testing for grip and usability.
erwin inclines his head in greeting when he sees jayce, setting the whole shebang aside for now. ]
Good to see you again. I hope you're doing well.
[ he's still not a small talk guy, but at least the greeting part rarely goes amiss. ]
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Pretty good. You too, I hope.
[ Jayce sets aside what he'd been tinkering with and unwrapping the arm, and also the padded elastic covering for his arm that he'd sewn (with help from Viktor). ]
We can see how this fits first, [ he says, handing over the latter as he runs one more diagnostic on the arm proper. ]
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[ the arm is beautiful, and the fact that erwin thinks so is open in his expression. he looks at it for a long moment before even taking the padded arm covering, but when he does he nods in agreement and shifts his stance slightly to allow him to work out how it goes on and apply it properly since he's got that short sleeve pinned right up to the shoulder seam already. levi's bound to want to help with anything he might need, but erwin also wants to know exactly how everything works so he can do it himself and also impart the information later.
this part at least is the most self-explanatory and easy to fiddle with. ]
It feels how I think it would, [ he offers, ] Snug but not too snug. It doesn't feel as though it's going to slip, either.
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[ Pushing his glasses up, Jayce isn't immune to the swell of pride at someone admiring his work. It feels good after everything that's happened to be able to create something like this, something he could be proud of. He lets Erwin get that first part on, standing by in case he asked for assistance. Otherwise, Jayce's attention is on the arm itself, carefully testing the mechanisms to make sure there aren't any issues. ]
That's good. If it starts to feel too loose, we can stitch another one. It should last a few months of regular use before the band starts to wear down. [ Jayce had written out some care instructions for it, which he handed over. ] There's some things for that, and the arm, on this in case you run into some problems, but I'll always be around if something happens.
[ Now for the important part: said arm. Lifting it up, Jayce walked it over to Erwin. ] How did you want to do this? I can help you, or I can walk you through it.
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well, let's just say it's a lot. he takes the care instructions with a nod, giving them a quick read before tucking them away. he'll give another read later, more lengthy, once this part is settled. ]
Of course. [ he considers the question, then settles on: ] I think my best bet for retention is to watch while you help with it once, then watch a removal, then replicate both myself in case I need to be corrected for in future.
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[ Stepping around to the side, Jayce kept the focus on the actual arm as he helped. ] It's sturdy, so don't worry about using the table for support or anything when you go to put it on. It might scratch the table, [ and Jayce chuckled, ] but it'll take a lot to do any damage to the arm itself. I made this from the same alloy I used for a lot of my projects back home.
[ It cost a lot of hours in late night labor to get his hands on the base materials, but it was worth it. Fitting it into place, Jayce made sure it was snug. ]
Once it's in place, it should sort of... [ Jayce gestures, and watches as the mechanisms in the arm come to life. ] Like that. You'll always know it's in place because it should do that on its own.
Did you want to see how it feels before I show you how to take it off?
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he is, pointedly, extremely normal about this, by which i mean his attention gets even more intense for a moment, in part because to be frank, there really isn't anything like this where he's from and every time he sees anything like this he's going to be a strange mixture of overwhelmed and fascinated.
at the suggestion erwin nods; it makes sense. he takes a moment to get used to the feel of it, the weight, how the joints work, how to make said joints and bits work. he can tell it's going to have a learning curve, but being able to, say, flex fingers (have fingers to flex in the first place) is, well, a good start. ]
I'll get used to the heft of it pretty quickly too, I think. It'll just be about re-learning my original center of balance from before I lost the limb in the first place.
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So he doesn't say anything, just observes, checks the mechanics of the arm as they come to life and move, and he waits. ]
Yeah, though I tried to make sure it weighs about the same as your other arm. It might be a little more but it's close.
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sorry this is so late
stares into the camera like i am in the office what is time
june i guess???? idfk
it chills him when someone goes home without warning. will he be next? are they running out of time? he can't live with that mindset, though. he can't waste the time they do have preoccupied with when it might end. he'd never forgive himself if it did.
easier said than done, but he's doing his best not to think about it.
as fate would have it, it's around the same time that apartments are made available to adopted—somewhere they can live with whoever they want. really, it was the one thing he could have wished for: the only thing that would be better than having Erwin back is having Erwin back and being able to live with him.
the idea alone of falling asleep every night and waking up every morning next to him makes him deliriously happy.
their new home is small, cramped even, but he doesn't notice and wouldn't care even if he did. it has basic furnishings, though, which is still more than he expected as someone who has always had nothing.
in fact, he has to comment in surprise the first time he sees their new bed: ]
Wow. It's so big.
[ it literally isn't. it's like a full bed at most, maybe even a double. sad! ]
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it'd be ideal, wouldn't it? more than this, even.
for now though, the apartments come at a good time. it lets them not have to worry about being apart for longer than necessary, or appeasing roommates while spending time with each other, or, frankly, despite never saying it aloud, having points where they're not able to tell if the other is still around or not.
maybe it's clingy, maybe it's codependent. that doesn't matter, nor does what anyone else would cause it. what matters, really, truly, is making sure they stay together (and that erwin can make levi happy, but at least he's not second-guessing himself on that one too badly lately).
so yeah, the apartment is great. beyond great, really, and erwin's just as happy as levi is. a small shared space is fine. it's self-contained, furnished, and all theirs.
erwin, too, is pleased by the bed. it's very tragic that them sharing a full bed is a cause for that much happiness. better than the twin they'd been sharing, sure, but still.
either way: ]
I think this place suits us.
[ small, simple, but theirs. homey in a way barracks or the dorms couldn't ever be. things erwin never expected to get. ]
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and now, they finally have their own private space. it's going to be so much easier like this.
so no, their bed is not large by normal people standards, but they don't really have normal people standards. Levi in particular slept sitting up in a fucking chair until after Erwin died, so this looks positively heavenly.
he smiles to himself, leaning to rest his head against Erwin's shoulder. ]
I'll try not to take up too much room.
[ this is a joke.
probably. ]
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but levi knows that. levi knows erwin better than anyone else ever has and sometimes erwin's chest tightens when he thinks about it not in a bad way but because he's never felt so grounded and at peace and he knows levi can tell.
it's nice. overwhelming, but nice.
the maybe-a-joke-maybe-not-a-joke just makes erwin smile as he looks down at the top of levi's head, more content than he's ever been. ]
Somehow I think we'll manage to balance how we share the space. [ see: all up in each other's business constantly. ] We always make do.
[ erwin doesn't notice it, but on the wall behind them his shadow has tilted its head further to rest on top of the shadow of levi's, somehow even more codependent than its owner.
weird! magic is weird. ]
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I don't even know what to do with so much space, to be honest. I never had—
[ how was he planning on finishing this sentence when he started talking? there's no good way. furniture? decorations? worldly possessions in general?
he never had anything. he just leaves it and moves on. ]
—Well, whatever. I'm sure you'll just naturally come up with the most strategically sound way to arrange everything, anyway.
[ he slips his hand into Erwin's, like he's preemptively proud of him for how perfectly he will undoubtedly arrange the contents of their apartment. ridiculous. ]
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erwin knocks their hips together after that last bit, then shifts to sit on the edge of the bed like he owns the place. which they technically do. crazy.
he holds out his hand, the organic one, and smiles. ]
The most comfortable arrangement, you mean.
[ because they get to be comfortable. crazy, but he's all for it. like, sure, it'll still be strategically sound, but it'll be a homey strategically sound. ]
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[ as adept as he is at talking shit, it's very difficult for him to do it to Erwin—believably, at least. there's just a little too much fondness in his voice covering the edge; a little too much pulling at the edges of his mouth threatening a smile.
why pretend he's not actually obscenely happy, though? why hold himself back from truly celebrating the fact that he gets to live with the man he loves indefinitely? it's a waste of their time, and he's not going to be doing any of that.
so when Erwin offers him his hand he takes it, lifts a knee onto the bed, and then uses all of his weight to ease Erwin down onto his back so he can just lie there on top of him.
just for a minute or two. probably. ]
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[ deadpan. now that they have time to just be People™ he's able to work a little more humor into regular conversations. it's nice. one of the plusses. but also it's kinda true. compared to levi he had a very cushy childhood (up to a certain point), but even that was, well, what it was.
he moves easily with levi's urging, dropping onto his back to look up at the other man with what can only be described as an overwhelming amount of fondness. he settles his hand at the small of levi's back afterward, head tilting.
happiness looks good on him. makes him look a little younger, even. ]
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[ he's perfectly aware Erwin's being facetious, but he's going to play along anyway. in fact, he makes something of a show of making himself as comfortable as possible on top of him, though it's not as effective as it would be if he weren't so much smaller than Erwin. a large dog would probably cause more discomfort.
in any case, once he's satisfied, he settles down and tucks his head under Erwin's chin. ]
That's too bad.
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[ he says this as levi shifts on top of him, as the smaller man gets as comfortable as possible atop erwin's frame. as the younger man tucks in under his chin he huffs out a small sound, affectionate and amused both, and slides his hand up to settle between levi's shoulder blades before he says anything else.
in fact, the other hand lifts to brush fingers through the ends of levi's hair. then he speaks. ]
I'm suddenly feeling much, much better. I'm not sure why that could possibly be.
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[ it's true, to be fair.
part of him just wants to stay where he is for hours. it's not very practical, unfortunately, but that's okay because starting now he gets to sleep with (sorry, next to) Erwin every single night.
maybe not directly on top of him, though. it can't possibly be that comfortable, no matter what Erwin says. with that in mind (and Erwin's comfort is always on his mind), he finally rolls off of him and attaches himself to Erwin's side instead. ]
I don't think I ever even imagined having a place like this.
[ certainly not with Erwin. ]
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[ the punchline here is supposed to be that erwin is very, very easygoing and normal and fine, but everyone following along at home knows he's the most intense man on any planet. with that said, he's getting a pass for his awful joke because when it comes to levi and only levi, his intensity has a different flavor that could be construed, if you squint really hard, as being easygoing.
when levi shifts so does erwin, though only to roll onto his side and drape his arm over levi to let it dangle, touching just to touch, his fingertips just barely brushing the sheets behind levi. ]
We didn't know this kind of existence was possible, so I don't think it's surprising to not have had that kind of daydream.
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